I was sitting on my bed like I always do while Andrew was sitting on his side with his laptop. I glanced over there and what did my eyes behold? A blog. I had no idea he had a blog. So I asked him and got the name of it. I read it and burst into tears at the end. It was so raw and so real. Everything said in there was true--from him admitting to being an "asshole" to me being a mad cow. I wonder if being a shit is better than being an asshole. I wonder if being a bottom feedin' dirt bag is better than both. I dunno. All I know is that asshole sums his actions up and mad cow is actually a nicer way to sum my behavior up.
It was all true. More true than I'd like to admit. More true than moss growing on the north side of trees. Isn't that where moss grows? It's been a long time since I've seen any moss on a tree. Anywho, back to the subject at hand. I told Andrew some nice things last night after "doing it". I don't know if he still doesn't know how to take a compliment or if he's just too used to me spitting venom at him. At least I feel like saying something nice.
From reading his blog, it sounds to me like he needs a serious break or vacation from me, which is well-deserved. I've always suggested a strip club or party. He declines. If I get better, I'm going to rent a ho. whoops, I mean strippers (2) for him and make myself invisible.
We have an understanding about cheating. As long as he wants safe and uncomplicated wife cutchie, I'll be here, but if his hotdog ends up in someone else's bun, the wife cutchie us off the table and closed permanently. I think that's fair. I don't mind if he rubbernecks all day and puts his neck out doing so. Looking and doing somethig about it are two different things. I've had enough sex in my life to be this way. I hope he stays on board with it.
Nap time.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
The angio date.
I am due to go in to get angioplasty of the neck. I guess the doc is going through the azigous (spell check please) vein anyway, so he'll be able to see it then. He couldn't see it in the scans and tried with the Doppler with no luck.
Wish me luck. I won't be knocked out just heavily sedated. Let's hopes this works.
We are scheduled with a different transport service. Andrew called the one we used last time and they gave us a big runaround. I guess they really didn't want our money. Too bad for those idiots. This is about what we want and need. Too bad. So sad. They can kiss my ass.
Wish me luck. I won't be knocked out just heavily sedated. Let's hopes this works.
We are scheduled with a different transport service. Andrew called the one we used last time and they gave us a big runaround. I guess they really didn't want our money. Too bad for those idiots. This is about what we want and need. Too bad. So sad. They can kiss my ass.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
My Blog
I recently received an email from another site forum. This person said it was difficult to read the white text on black. I changed it to a white background with black text. Only problem with that is I can't read it.
Hubby came home and I told him. He said leave it the way it was and too bad. So, I changed it back so I can read it. He said that he can read it just fine.
Hubby came home and I told him. He said leave it the way it was and too bad. So, I changed it back so I can read it. He said that he can read it just fine.
Thursday's Floor Routine
When Andrew came home, it was shower night. Only problem was that I didn't take a nap right before it. Everything went fine until I tried to get back on the bed.
I went from the shower chair to the bed and slipped off the bed and onto the floor. I was there crying for about an hour. Then I finally accepted the O2 and up on the bed I went. I think I hurt my foot and I know I pulled my knee again. Ugh. I'm gonna have to get a hoyer lift.
I went from the shower chair to the bed and slipped off the bed and onto the floor. I was there crying for about an hour. Then I finally accepted the O2 and up on the bed I went. I think I hurt my foot and I know I pulled my knee again. Ugh. I'm gonna have to get a hoyer lift.
...interesting. O2???
So I got an oxygen condenser from a friend who is an M.D. I believe my brain has been oxygen starved for who knows how long. I use it and immediately have better eyesight, less to no pain in the legs, no brain fog, and stamina to be awake. Who knew? I've been told to use it as much as I want throughout the day.
Friday, March 19, 2010
The Scans
This is how the events of the day went per time.
March 17 have bladder catheter installed at 4 p.m.
March 18 2:45 a.m. I wake up. Snooze off and on until 4 a.m.
4 a.m. alarm goes off & Andrew gets up.
5:45 a.m. Get into electric wheelchair and head to the van.
5:47 a.m. Van driver wants me to back up onto the lift. It's dark. I can't see. I pull in frontwards which means Andrew has to come in the van and put my feet down so I can turn around and face forwards.
5:49 a.a. Andrew comes into the back of the van and while doing so hits his head hard on the top of the door. It nocks him over. The van driver was standing right there and could have told him to watch his head when entering but didn'. Andrew picks himself up after a few minutes and helps me to put my feet down. I turn to face the windshield and the feet go back up. Meanwhile I'm worried about Andrew's head because it left a bump, gash, goose egg and bruise. I keep asking him if his vision went off. He continues to say he's fine.
6 a.m. The driver tethers my chair in.
6:05 a.m. we are off.
6:10 a.m. While driving down the road it becomes apparent that the driver of this medivan was not versed on country roads, or curves, or the speed at which to drive as a whole. It also became apparent later that she wasn't experienced with wind or driving a disabled person somewhere or off ramps or...need I go on? This driver needed a lot more training.
6:30 a.m. So at the stop sign to turn right to go into town she takes a sharp and fast right. This caused the right side of my wheelchair to take flight and come off of the ground. It landed again as the van straightened out after the turn and I leaned to the right to set the wheel back down. That should have never happened for two reasons that doesn't take a genius to figure out... 1. she should have not turned so sharp or so speedily. 2. She should have tethered my wheelchair to the floor a lot tighter. Isn't that what those floor ties are for? If I were anyone else in that wheelchair that probably would have broken my neck.
7:30 a.m. I puke in the van. Most of it goes down the front. Some of it ends up on the van. Mmm french fries. We stop on the side of the road, clean me up, and are on the way again.
7:40 a.m. The fun starts. I don't know what turn off it was but the driver decides to take it at last minute and ends up hugging the cans between the highway and the off ramp. I can't believe she didn't get us killed. Then off the wrong off ramp we go to down town/city. So her navi is confused, she's driving downtown, and Andrew is beside himself. I piped up and gave directions. She says "I know". Apparently she doesn't from what she's doing. Oh and she says this is the second time being in that particular city and has never been to the particular hospital where we are going. What? No wonder why the company only pays minimum wage to it's drivers. They suck! So the she finds her way to the freeway.
8:00 a.m. We arrive at the hospital 15 minutes late.
8:15 a.m. I have barf juice all over my front. Andrew and I go to a dressing room where I put on two hospital gowns and clean up a little more.
8:20 a.m. Andrew fills out paperwork at the reception desk and then we wait.
8:40 a.m. We are sent to a waiting room (I sit in my elect. chair in the hall--more air/ventilation there).
8:45 a.m. 3 nice gentlemen come to me with a Hoyer lift. Thank God I won't have to try to transfer. I had never used one before, so it was a little different and a bit scary, but they knew what they were doing. They put me on the gurney. The Ativan that I took earlier was starting to kick in. Lying on my back wasn't so bad as long as my calves and ankles were elevated which they did.
9:40 a.m. I believe was the actual time I went in the tube. It was uneventful. I slept on and off.
10:40 a.m. Done with the MRI tube, back on the hoyer lift, and back on the trusty old wheelchair again. It seems Andrew was still okay. That was a hard hit he took on the head. How about some warning driver!
11:00 a.m. To the vascular center and beyond--no just the vascular center. They had our info. We waited a few minutes until someone came out and told us that both the neuroradiologist durgeon and the leg doctor had a meeting until one, but she was going to try to locate the neuroradiologist.
11:10 a.m. We were put into a nice and big room and shortly the neuroradiologist came by to chat with us a bit before his meeting. He explained what he saw on the MRV and said I had a narrow right side vein with a large left side vein that had spider veins. He explained why he wanted to do angio and not stenting. I don't remember if he said he wanted to do both sides at once. I'll get back to ya on that.
11:20 a.m. so off to the meeting both doctors went. And now we wait until 1 p.m.
During this time, Andrew ate a snack and I wouldn't eat anything because I was afraid to lose it. A nurse came in and talked about compression hose, but then gave up.
1:00 p.m. Both docs return. The leg doc tries to close curtains to give me privacy. The scan starts on the legs. The leg doctor intermittently squeezes the calves during the sonogram scan. His verdict is that the muscles in my legs are not making the valves retun the blood. He suggests doing leg exercises and using a bicycle, which I will do when I feel better. Right now pointing and retracting the toes is about as good as it gets.
1:15 p.m. The neuroradiologist/surgeon comes in and watches the scans of the neck. His verdict is narrowing of the right side and spider veins on the left.
1:30 p.m. Neuroradiologist says a rimeframe for procedure, we talk a little more. At this point I am so tired I can't remember much more.
3:00 p.m. leave for home. It's windy and the driver swerves and ends up in oncoming traffic. I'm really too tired to notice.
5:00 pm home at last.
March 17 have bladder catheter installed at 4 p.m.
March 18 2:45 a.m. I wake up. Snooze off and on until 4 a.m.
4 a.m. alarm goes off & Andrew gets up.
5:45 a.m. Get into electric wheelchair and head to the van.
5:47 a.m. Van driver wants me to back up onto the lift. It's dark. I can't see. I pull in frontwards which means Andrew has to come in the van and put my feet down so I can turn around and face forwards.
5:49 a.a. Andrew comes into the back of the van and while doing so hits his head hard on the top of the door. It nocks him over. The van driver was standing right there and could have told him to watch his head when entering but didn'. Andrew picks himself up after a few minutes and helps me to put my feet down. I turn to face the windshield and the feet go back up. Meanwhile I'm worried about Andrew's head because it left a bump, gash, goose egg and bruise. I keep asking him if his vision went off. He continues to say he's fine.
6 a.m. The driver tethers my chair in.
6:05 a.m. we are off.
6:10 a.m. While driving down the road it becomes apparent that the driver of this medivan was not versed on country roads, or curves, or the speed at which to drive as a whole. It also became apparent later that she wasn't experienced with wind or driving a disabled person somewhere or off ramps or...need I go on? This driver needed a lot more training.
6:30 a.m. So at the stop sign to turn right to go into town she takes a sharp and fast right. This caused the right side of my wheelchair to take flight and come off of the ground. It landed again as the van straightened out after the turn and I leaned to the right to set the wheel back down. That should have never happened for two reasons that doesn't take a genius to figure out... 1. she should have not turned so sharp or so speedily. 2. She should have tethered my wheelchair to the floor a lot tighter. Isn't that what those floor ties are for? If I were anyone else in that wheelchair that probably would have broken my neck.
7:30 a.m. I puke in the van. Most of it goes down the front. Some of it ends up on the van. Mmm french fries. We stop on the side of the road, clean me up, and are on the way again.
7:40 a.m. The fun starts. I don't know what turn off it was but the driver decides to take it at last minute and ends up hugging the cans between the highway and the off ramp. I can't believe she didn't get us killed. Then off the wrong off ramp we go to down town/city. So her navi is confused, she's driving downtown, and Andrew is beside himself. I piped up and gave directions. She says "I know". Apparently she doesn't from what she's doing. Oh and she says this is the second time being in that particular city and has never been to the particular hospital where we are going. What? No wonder why the company only pays minimum wage to it's drivers. They suck! So the she finds her way to the freeway.
8:00 a.m. We arrive at the hospital 15 minutes late.
8:15 a.m. I have barf juice all over my front. Andrew and I go to a dressing room where I put on two hospital gowns and clean up a little more.
8:20 a.m. Andrew fills out paperwork at the reception desk and then we wait.
8:40 a.m. We are sent to a waiting room (I sit in my elect. chair in the hall--more air/ventilation there).
8:45 a.m. 3 nice gentlemen come to me with a Hoyer lift. Thank God I won't have to try to transfer. I had never used one before, so it was a little different and a bit scary, but they knew what they were doing. They put me on the gurney. The Ativan that I took earlier was starting to kick in. Lying on my back wasn't so bad as long as my calves and ankles were elevated which they did.
9:40 a.m. I believe was the actual time I went in the tube. It was uneventful. I slept on and off.
10:40 a.m. Done with the MRI tube, back on the hoyer lift, and back on the trusty old wheelchair again. It seems Andrew was still okay. That was a hard hit he took on the head. How about some warning driver!
11:00 a.m. To the vascular center and beyond--no just the vascular center. They had our info. We waited a few minutes until someone came out and told us that both the neuroradiologist durgeon and the leg doctor had a meeting until one, but she was going to try to locate the neuroradiologist.
11:10 a.m. We were put into a nice and big room and shortly the neuroradiologist came by to chat with us a bit before his meeting. He explained what he saw on the MRV and said I had a narrow right side vein with a large left side vein that had spider veins. He explained why he wanted to do angio and not stenting. I don't remember if he said he wanted to do both sides at once. I'll get back to ya on that.
11:20 a.m. so off to the meeting both doctors went. And now we wait until 1 p.m.
During this time, Andrew ate a snack and I wouldn't eat anything because I was afraid to lose it. A nurse came in and talked about compression hose, but then gave up.
1:00 p.m. Both docs return. The leg doc tries to close curtains to give me privacy. The scan starts on the legs. The leg doctor intermittently squeezes the calves during the sonogram scan. His verdict is that the muscles in my legs are not making the valves retun the blood. He suggests doing leg exercises and using a bicycle, which I will do when I feel better. Right now pointing and retracting the toes is about as good as it gets.
1:15 p.m. The neuroradiologist/surgeon comes in and watches the scans of the neck. His verdict is narrowing of the right side and spider veins on the left.
1:30 p.m. Neuroradiologist says a rimeframe for procedure, we talk a little more. At this point I am so tired I can't remember much more.
3:00 p.m. leave for home. It's windy and the driver swerves and ends up in oncoming traffic. I'm really too tired to notice.
5:00 pm home at last.
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